The KEY to Communication: It’s Not What You Say, It’s HOW
Saying the right things in the wrong ways can cause you to miscommunicate what your intentions are to your audience. For example, if you give a presentation on a new manufacturing process that recycles 90% of the previous material (Que monotone) *but you sound unenthusiastic*, you probably wont get many nods of approvals. Rather, you’ll get a crowd with blank stares. Not because you said anything wrong. But because the audience matched your level. In this case, the message may have been perfect. But the execution, the way you said your message missed the mark. Let’s dive into why "it's not what you say, it's how you say it" is a mantra every successful communicator lives by.
Navigating the Nuances of Communication
The challenge here isn’t just about delivering a message but delivering it in a way that resonates, motivates, and doesn't alienate. You want your audience to feel encapsulated. Your words, your sentences, phrases, everything reels them in. When there’s a hint of sorrow in your voice it transcends to them. When you get motivated, and speak faster and start moving more, they get motivated as well. The words you choose are important, but the way you deliver them can change everything. Miscommunication often stems not from the content of the message but from the tone, body language, and context in which it's delivered. Sadness, confidence, relaxation. There’s a youtuber and I cant believe I forgot his name, but he plays dubstep or techno out in public and attracts an audience. I’ve seen him play at coffee shops and at foster care facilities. And guess what. The people IN those buildings matched his energy. That is the power of having your message resonate with the audience. HOWEVER. it can also happen that it leads to misunderstandings, conflicts, and a breakdown in trust. There could very well be scenarios where someone misunderstands you based on the tone. In the workplace, this can happen often if you dont practice your communication skills. Therefore, it’s important to understand that leading a team requires you to truly understand each member of your team and how receptive they are to various methods of communication.
Mastering the Art of Delivery
To navigate this complex terrain, you need a toolkit of strategies that can help you communicate more effectively. Here’s how you can transform your communication style to ensure your message is not only heard but also understood and appreciated.
1. Understand the Power of Tone
The same words can have vastly different meanings depending on how they are said. I love using this example to illustrate the power of tone in emphases. We’ll use the sentence “I never said she stole my money” theres 7 different meanings depending on what we emphasize. “i” never said she stole my money - meaning it wasnt me who said it. i “never” said she stole my money, meaning I didnt actually say that. i never “said” she stole my money, meaning i probably implied it. i never said “she” stole my money, meaning i never accused her. i never said she “stole” my money, meaning i didnt say she stole anything. Andd you get the point. the power of TONE is that important. the same sentence can have SEVEN different meanings. keep that in mind. Now, imagine the positive or negative impact tone can have with a full conversation! Best advice here is to try and catch yourself. The more you attune yourself to really listening to what you say, the better the odds of you catching irregular tones.
2. Choose Your Words Wisely
While tone is crucial, the words you choose also matter. Politeness, clarity, and specificity can make a big difference. For example, saying “I think we should consider this option” is more inviting than “We need to do this.” The former opens up the floor for discussion, whereas the latter can come off as demanding. When you want to encapsulate the audience or your team you don’t speak blandly. Think of when you’re trying to make your partner blush. Do you say “you look pretty” or “wow. you look beautiful” get me? now hold up. dont go around telling your team theyre beautiful that was just an example, relax diddy. However, as a leader in the workplace you motivate by pushing the team. you dont say lets TRY and complete as many orders as possible, lets TRY and not have any collisions, lets TRY and make more sales, no of course not. the words you use are Let’s DO more sales, lets GET more revenue in the door. Choose your words, make them resonate with your team or audience. It should invoke emotions.
3. Non-Verbal Communication
Your body language, facial expressions, and eye contact play a significant role in how your message is received. Open body language, such as uncrossed arms and nodding shows that you are approachable and engaged. Smiling can also make your message more positive and inviting. When i was editing my videos I noticed i was leaning back on my chair, mad chilling. And i hated that i did that but look i have back problems from my time in the marines and its comfortable for me to sit back okay! but i was signalling a nonverbal que to my audience. Nonverbal communication is critical in presentations where you are in front of an audience because you can expel energy by moving your hands. l you want to be free, move around, dont stand still like a toothpick. Move around, be free, show that you’re alive. The key here is to look friendly. Don’t worry about trying to look “powerful.” Your presentation itself should reflect that strength.
4. Context is Key
Always consider the context in which you’re delivering your message. A joke that works in a casual setting might not be appropriate in a formal meeting. Similarly, feedback given in a public forum can be humiliating, whereas the same feedback given in private can be constructive. Just make sure you read the room. Be self-aware and make sure the comments you make are not out of line.
5. Active Listening
Effective communication is a two-way street. Make sure to listen actively to your audience's responses. This shows respect and allows you to adjust your message in real-time. For instance, if you notice confusion, you can clarify your point immediately. Always feel free to ask questions to ensure everyone is aligned. The important factor here is that you are actively participating in a sort of ritual with the audience. You are receiving from them just as much as you are giving. However, you need to be receptive. I’ve seen leaders or presenters who feel insulted when the audience doesnt align with their views. You can’t let that happen. Don’t take it personal. It’s a learning experience, and being receptive with what the audience says can lead you to some of your best speeches if you push forward and pivot.
Transformation Through Effective Communication
By mastering the art of effective communication, you transform not just your message but also your impact. It's about turning complex ideas into relatable stories, ensuring clarity, and engaging your audience. Remember, the goal is not just to be heard, but to be understood and remembered. With every interaction, you’re not just conveying information; you’re building relationships and establishing your credibility. So, practice these strategies, and watch how your communication style transforms your professional and personal interactions.
Effective communication is a powerful tool that can set you apart in any field. It's about making your words resonate, inspire, and lead to action. So, start today, and become the communicator you've always wanted to be. You’ve got this!
